Tag Archives: road rage

Learning to Drive in Arkansas

15 Dec

Basically, Arkansas is an absolutely horrendous state to drive in, let alone grow up driving in. I think that I have gathered tremendous amounts of road rage trying to survive the mountainous streets and “highways” that Arkansas offers. I thought that perhaps I would share with you the top 10 things I have learned driving in the Natural State.

  1. You lose your right to “right on red” when the person coming from the other direction decides that he or she would rather turn into the furthest lane illegally and honks and/or flips you off because suddenly your legal right turn became illegal to the rest of the Arkansans driving.
  2. The right lane is obviously the passing lane because people are too prideful to pull over into that lane when they have people speeding past them in the right lane.
  3. Blinkers are just for looks.
  4. You should only ever drive 20 mph over or under the speed limit.
  5. When you drive drunk, be sure to tailgate. It is really safe, and everyone around you will love you for it.
  6. If someone is trying to pass you on a 2-way road with the first straight-stretch for many miles, be sure to speed up so they know you are annoyed that they are passing your slow ass.
  7. Don’t ever turn your brights off; people won’t notice at all.
  8. When it is dark and tons of deer are out near the roads, tailgating is an excellent way to spend your evening.
  9. When someone is driving up the entrance ramp onto the highway, be sure to stay in the right lane and race them to see who slams their brakes first. Chicken, anyone?
  10. When there are signs stating a re-route because of construction, that construction was probably done about 2 months prior to your viewing of the signs.

Anywhere is better than here. I promise.